Goodbye Pilipins...for now. - Ditse

Yesterday morning, the whole family sent off my sister to begin a new life in the land of the midnight sun (and loads of snow), Finland. She accepted a one-year cooking job in one of the hotel chains there. She left us, her family, AND her long time boyfriend behind.

There's my mom, myself and now my sister…Coincidence? Do LDRs really run in the family?!?

I guess it's just sheer coincidence. But I think that having a number of LDRs in the family help us learn from each other's experience…hoping it would be in a good way. Hehehe! I am sending all my love and prayers to my dear sister, who will cook up a storm in Finland!

I wish not only peace but a moment of rest for OFWs around the world

This holiday season has been the pits. My lola passed away, then work has been crazy busy (catching up for my bereavement leaves plus more stuff in preparation for next year. It's a ghost town here and everyone is on leave!!!!). Now, Dodong and I have been competing on who has the more miserable holiday.

Guess who has a more miserable Christmas between the two of us? Dodong OF COURSE! Just like many OFWs out there…

He is a Catholic in a Muslim country.

Despite Dubai's riding the wave of westernization (apparently Dubai's hotels have towering Christmas trees in their grand lobbies), it still is a Muslim country. So there are no Christmas Holidays over there. No special non-working holidays. Boo. Therefore, point number two…

He will be working on ALL holidays.

I thought I was in the dumps because I had to work during this holiday season. But at least, I still have non-working holidays tomorrow, the 27th and the 31st. Dodong has none at all!

This I must say is one of the most admirable things about our OFWs. They so really work their asses off for the betterment of the lives of the loved ones back home. So THANK YOU!

He is away from HOME.

Like many OFWs (especially those who did not get the opportunity to come home), he is away from all family and friends. Sure he has friends there, but I guess it is not the same at all. Though I am "alone", I am surrounded by family and friends!

Plus I still get to enjoy all the comforts and familiarities of home. Iba talaga ang Pinoy Christmas, which includes stuff like the hamon (pork is hard to find in the UAE!), puto bumbong, bibingka, simbang gabi, etc.

I think it is a bit of a psychological torture for OFWs during this holiday season. I salute them really because of all the sacrifices they've made for us, family and loved ones. We are most grateful and I hope that this would lessen the misery in this Christmas season.

Smile! We love you!

Have a Merry Christmas everyone! Wherever in the world you are!4

Getting ready to go off into the sunset...

Lola's condition is not getting any better. I am not being pessimistic, but stating a matter of fact. We just came from the hospital, her blood pressure (BP) continues to drop (30-40 / palpatonic – a new word I learned) plus she had a seizure late this afternoon. We are just waiting, waiting, waiting for her to finally join her Creator.

I've realized that waiting for someone to pass on is pretty much like what we have in long distance relationships. Pretty morbid, but hear me out first…

In a long distance relationship, both parties wait for each other with no guarantee of ending up in each other's arms again. Like waiting for someone to terminally ill (or in a life and death situation just as my lola's), there are no guarantees that they'd rise up and be 100% well again.

I'm all for long distance relationships, but there is a risk. There are not guarantees, even if we make it work. But that's the beauty in it. We are all willing to take risks because of LOVE.

Sigh. Isn't it obvious I'm a bit down in the dumps?

While I was waiting yesterday, I read through our family's daily log book. We all wrote the time we came in and any progress (or otherwise) Lola shows as the day goes by. My 10-year old cousin's poem brought me to tears:

by Mattie

I'd also like to share with you my favorite verse of the week that keeps me afloat somehow:

"I believe that I shall see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living."

Psalm 27: 13

Hope you are all having a better week than I am…

Love the distance,

Inday I. Nagintay

"Tic. Toc. Tic. Toc" says the Life Support System

Our family has been going through tough times (both emotionally and financially) in the past couple of weeks because our lola (grandmother) had hemorrhagic stroke last November 16. She's 83 years old and the hemorrhagic stroke obviously did a whole lot of damage. It's been two weeks since she was last conscious.

Now this kept me thinking…1) You will never know when your time is. 2) What if something like this happened to Dodong and myself?

1) You will never know when your time is.

Truly. Last November 16, around 6AM, my lolo (grandfather) and lola were having their usual conversations when lola vomited blood and conked out. She was then rushed to the hospital and was kept in the ICU for days. We really did not expect this to happen.

At 83 years old, my lola was still very strong.  She still has a sharp memory and manages to get around the house. In fact, she was in a better condition versus my lolo, whose eyesight and memory was deteriorating due to diabetes.

We really weren't prepared. How come we are built (for some strange reason) not to be prepared for things like this? It's such a burden, both emotionally and financially. Of course, emotional burden is stating the obvious. But hospital costs are a b*tch. It's been two weeks and the bill is around half a million pesos already!

Hang in there lola...

2) What if something like this happens to Dodong and myself?

I honestly don't know. But one thing's for sure, I do want to prepare for this every single day. We all should.

If I can say how much I love him, I would do this. If I need to get insurance (which I already have), I think I'd need to revisit my budget for this. Seriously.

Here is a parting shot I'd like to share. This scene, every time I visit the hospital, ALWAYS brings me thisclose to tears:

Hold on lola.

Sorry lola, I know it's an unglamorous shot. But I just can't help but feel all the love when lolo does that.

Pls do continue to pray for my lola. Your prayers would be much appreciated.

Love the distance,

Inday I. Nagintay

P.S. On a very superficial note, I am still very much in love with the Vignette App. How are you liking the photos so far?

Parati na lang ba ako magsosolo?

Yesterday, our department threw a Despedida de Soltera (the traditional Filipino bachelorette party – obviously a very wholesome one) lunch for a teammate, who is tying the knot next Sunday. We ate a hearty lunch ay H.K. Choi (one that made me very sleepy and groggy for the rest of the working day) and had a mini-program.

We shared our well wishes: corny, downright witty, cheesy and wise. How I loved the words of the wise…the messages of the married and fab gals of the Corporate Marketing department did leave an impression worth sharing…

P, who has been married for 5 years, said that her relationship with her husband grew because they respected each other's individuality. They gave each other personal space to do their own thing well at the same time support what each other did. They grew as themselves, as individuals at the same time, grew together with each's wins (and I assume losses as well).

I so agree with her!

Dodong and I were (and still is) not the couple who can't seem to be separated from each other, the type that did EVERY SINGLE THING together. We lived separate lives even when he was still here in the Philippines. He had his world and I had mine. Sometimes his world crossed over into mine, but it's not required. I did not mind having my world all to myself.

And being in a LDR, we still continue to have each of our separate lives. We are practically FORCED to live separate lives and maintain the ME in WE because of the physical distance. But, I'd like to think that we did fine. We still manage to come together beautifully, despite of this.

So again, word from the wise: Do not lose the ME in WE.

Love the distance,

Inday I. Nagintay

Just like my perfume

It's been 5 days since Dodong has left again and I miss him so bad. The other night, I ended up crying myself to sleep because I miss him so. But at the same time I am really grateful for this homecoming. It made me fall in love with Dodong all over again…

Why such mushy falling in love all over again statement? Even after 8 years of being together I still manage to find reasons to just fall for him…

This homecoming was DIFFERENT. It opened my heart and soul to a different Dodong as he (as usual) never failed to surprise me once again. No, he did not have any grand gifts like the 7-dozen bouquets on our 7th year anniversary. Though we did have a grand Northern Luzon roadtrip.

But grand gestures are not the reasons why I fell in love with Dodong all over again…It is really the little things.

How he shared himself with my family, his stories and a whole Banoffee pie.

How he envisions the future for US, the very near future.

How he makes me roll on the floor laughing with his puns and sarcastic lines.

How he makes sure I am healthy and well by keeping the bacon off the plate. At least TRY to.

How he has grand dreams and life ambitions, whether or not I agree with them.

How he remains to be himself and no one else.

I just love Dodong so much. *swoon* I pray that it will be like this until the end of time. Is this too much mush and cheese for you? Hehehe.

Love the distance,

Inday I. Nagintay

Many a times I do wonder and ponder: when my ONE-ness end? When will I get to enjoy events and whatnots with my plus ONE?

I don’t want to end up being the odd ONE out every single time. And I am super relieved that this is one of the things that Dodong and I do agree on (Believe me there are a gazillion things we do not agree on). Our being in a LDR is just a temporary state.

We both are working real hard (It’s been a week since my last post as I’ve had my hands tied and sucky Internet service to deal with) to get ourselves out of the LDR. Yes, we are happy in the LDR state. But who doesn’t want to be physically together with their one true love?

Love the distance,

Inday I. Nagintay

P.S. I'd like to get to know you better so hope you could answer a quick survey here.